Thirty Minute Mentors Podcast Transcript: Olympic Gold Medalist Bryan Clay
I recently interviewed Olympic gold medalist Bryan Clay on my podcast, Thirty Minute Mentors. Here is a transcript of our interview:
Adam: Our guest today was the greatest athlete in the world, winning the decathlon in the Beijing Summer Olympics. Bryan Clay is an Olympic gold medalist and an entrepreneur, as he is also the co-founder of Eat the Frog Fitness. Bryan, thank you for joining us.
Bryan: Yeah, no problem. Thanks for having me.
Adam: Bryan, you were born in Austin, Texas, but you grew up in Honolulu before moving to Southern California to run track at Azusa Pacific University. Can you take listeners back to your early days? What early experiences and lessons shaped your worldview and shape the trajectory of your success?
Bryan: I grew up in Hawaii, a very multicultural place. I'm half Japanese, half African American. And so, my mom's side of the family, the Japanese side of my family, I grew up with, I would say, a very Japanese upbringing. We were very traditional and followed a lot of the culture and that sort of thing. And so, I truly believe that a big part of my personality and my success was a lot of what I learned from the Japanese culture. The idea of excellence in everything that you do, the tenacity or drive to be perfect or to seek perfection in whatever you put your mind to was something that I was taught and was ingrained in me from the time I was a very young boy. And growing up, learning that I think set the framework and the groundwork for what I was able to do later on in my life with track and field.
Adam: Who are those people that instilled that in you? Was it family members? Was it members of your community? How did you get that?
Bryan: I think my family if they're listening to this, would tell you they would all laugh, but it was my grandfather, my Ojichan. Like, he's the one who I worked with every weekend when friends and everybody were going out and having fun at the beach. I was at home working and learning how to work. And I spent probably most of my time as a young boy with him learning what he would say the responsibilities of a man, like the things that you need to know if you're going to grow up in this world and be successful and how to take care of a family and how to provide for your family and do all those types of things. And like I said, he was very traditional Japanese. And so, for me, that's who shaped me. And then, of course, my mom was there as a supporting role to that. My grandmother was there. My aunties and my uncles were all there to help me with all of that as well. But yeah, primarily, I would say it was my grandfather.
Adam: I love it. And when we think back about the people who shaped us most, it could be a parent, it could be a sibling, it could be a grandparent, it could be someone outside of your family. But we're a byproduct of our mentors. And in your case, you've had a lot of mentors, but clearly the most impactful mentor in your life is your grandfather.
Bryan: Yeah, he's the one who was there from the time that I was a young boy all the way through high school. He was that male figure that was there. My mom and dad got divorced and then I had my stepdad and those types of things. But my grandfather is who I spent a lot of time with and he really, I think it's that generation They really believed in molding and shaping the younger generation that were coming up. And so, they felt this responsibility to teach the younger generation what they had learned through their life. And my grandfather took that very seriously. And he taught me a lot. He taught me a lot growing up.
When I was younger, I probably didn't appreciate the lessons that he taught me and I thought maybe they were dumb or they were stupid or that I would never use them or they didn't make sense or whatever that might be. But as I've gotten older and just gone through life a little more and experienced a little more, I've experienced the ups and the downs that life brings, I experienced the ups and the downs of owning your own business and going through experiences similar to what they went through with the Great Depression and wars and all those types of things and how you have to learn to survive through those types of things. I appreciate the lessons my grandfather taught me even more today than I ever did when he was alive and teaching him to me in the moment.
Adam: Or are there any particular lessons as we're talking as you're reflecting that really stand out to you?
Bryan: There's a lot, but one that is just a funny one that I always have remembered, I've never forgotten is he used some pretty colorful language often. And I remember as I would do work for him and it was a lot of manual labor, whether it was painting or plumbing or roofing or whatever it might be building something. He'd start me out on jobs that were to teach me. And so, I started out like sweeping and sweeping up the shop and sweeping up all these areas and cleaning. And he would look to see how good of a job I would do with that. Would I take pride in my work, even if it was just sweeping up at the end? And I remember as I would do it, I would. not really care I'm like it's I'm sweeping who cares like just do whatever and just try to get the job done as quickly as possible.
And he would always tell me, listen, when you go to the bathroom, and you sit on the toilet, and you take a crap, he'd say you wipe your ass well the first time. because you don't want to have to deal with it later. He's like, same thing when you're doing a job when you're doing a job, do it right the first time, do it well, because you don't want to have to deal with it later. And I know that that's a funny one. And maybe people don't take that seriously. But over my time on this earth, I've learned time and time again, that when you do a job, when it's time for you to step up and do something, you do it right the first time, because you don't want to have to deal with all the repercussions of it later. I know it's a simple one, but it's an impactful one. And if people just did that one thing, if they just changed that one part of their life, I think people would be amazed at the difference that it would make, the impact that it would have on their everyday life.
Adam: Bryan, you shared a lot there that we can unpack. No pun intended. Take pride in what you do. Do it right the first time and do it well. And you were joking around about the way that your grandfather shared that lesson with you. But at the end of the day, his style of communication worked. However, you're able to convey the message, make sure that you're conveying in a way that your audience is going to receive it and act upon it. So, your grandfather understood how he needed to get his message across in a way that it would be received by you. And clearly, it was.
Bryan: Yeah, and I think that's definitely the case. I think the other thing that I would add to that is consistency. I think a lot of times, even as a parent, I think I'm going to tell somebody to do something one time and they're going to boom, light's going to go off in their head and they're going to get it and they're just going to do it. And what I've learned in my own life through coaching, believe it or not, and parenting, is that if you want somebody to learn a lesson, especially if it's a lesson that they don't already intrinsically know, it takes consistency.
Just as much as it takes discipline on their end to make the decision to do it and to do it over and over and over again until it becomes a habit, I as a coach have to understand that if I'm going to help somebody develop and I'm going to help them take them from maybe 0 to 10, I need to actually develop them through that process. And it takes consistency and discipline on my part to remind them over and over and over again of what it is that they need to do or correct them over and over and over again as to what it is that they need to do to be successful. It's not, I think, just the person bringing the message and bringing the lesson, but it's also the person receiving the message and the lesson. And it's a dance that you do, whether you know it or not. And it's all in the spirit of developing this younger person or this person that's underneath you to become a better person in the end.
Adam: And that's a great point. Really important message for everyone listening. The importance of being coachable. You weren't born the greatest athlete in the world. You had whatever natural talent you had, but at the end of the day, you had great coaches who helped you get to that next level. But it was also on you being coachable and wanting to receive that information, taking that information, and acting on it.
Bryan: Yeah, absolutely. Some of the other things that I always talk about, I just wrote a whole speech that I haven't had a chance to give yet, but I was at a conference and I heard somebody speaking and it just got my brain to thinking and there's this idea of passion, not perfection. And my whole reason behind that is when a lot of times we think that when somebody is coaching us, or when there are expectations on us, or when we're trying to achieve something that it requires perfection.
And if you've ever played a sport, especially one like the decathlon, which is what I did, you realize that there is no such thing as perfection. If you ask any professional athlete, they will tell you, that perfection doesn't exist. We're always striving to be perfect, but we never ever actually achieve perfection. Even when we break the world record at something, if you ask an athlete, they're going to tell you all the different things that they did wrong in that world record performance that they could do better the next time to be even better. And that's that kind of idea of excellence that we have. But I would love for people to understand that this idea of passion, not perfection, you've got to be passionate about something, you've got to find your passion for something.
And it doesn't mean that it has to be something you necessarily liked to begin with. You can learn to be passionate about something, but you've got to become passionate about it because passion produces excellence. If you're passionate about something, you're going to want to know more about it. If you're passionate about something, you're going to want to have more of it. If you're passionate about something, you're going to sacrifice for it. You're going to have courage for it. You're going to protect it. You're going to do all of the things that it requires to become great at it. But if that passion's not there, then it's really difficult. And so, I always tell people like, listen, I can talk to you all day long about how to make your business better. I can talk to you about how to be a better athlete. I can do all of those things. But if you can't find any passion for it, then it's going to be a long, lonely road for you trying to become successful at it.
Adam: How do you uncover your passion for track and field and ultimately for the decathlon?
Bryan: For me, I think I figured out my passion and it may be started a little different. My passion was to be popular and it was to be the best at something because I thought being the best at something would get me what I wanted. And that's what I'm talking about when I was younger. And I was in high school and it was all about popularity and who was cool and the jocks and all this kind of stuff. And it was a tool to kind of achieve that. And that's what I was passionate about. That's what I wanted more than anything at the time.
But as I got older, I started to see, and I got closer to graduating from high school, I started to see that this passion that I had or this sport that I had could actually be a tool for me to get out of my house and get away from my parents and be on my own and become my own man and make my own decisions and go out and conquer the world. And so that became my passion. And then as I got older and I started to have my own faith and those types of things, that passion began to change and morph into something different.
And it really began to turn into something that went beyond a gold medal, beyond competing, and beyond just getting the money and the accolades and the popularity. But it became more about how can I give back to the people that are coming up behind me. How can I be a better father, a better husband, and use what I built with my track and field career as a platform to share the stories that allowed me to do the things that I've done in my life and make a difference in the world? Those passions changed over time, but ultimately what happened was that my passion is what drove me to be successful in my sport.
Adam: Your passions can and will evolve over time. But in order to be successful, you have to be passionate and you have to pursue your passion. If you're not passionate about what you do, the person right next to you is going to be and he's going to be ahead of you in the race.
Bryan: Yep, absolutely. When it all comes down to it, I mean, listen, when you're an athlete and you get, for me, you step on the line and you're at the 100 meters and you're getting ready to start this race, everybody on that line is capable of winning. Like they all physically have what it takes. They all typically mentally have what it takes and sometimes it just comes down to who wants it more. Really, I know it doesn't sound right when in the decathlon when you're in the 10th event or the 9th event or the 8th event and we've had two 12- or 14-hour long days and you've got three hours of sleep in between and your body is just wrecked and sore and everything in terms of energy wise is gone spiritually you're completely spent emotionally you're spent everything is just drained out of you.
The only thing you have left is to see who wants it more. It's who is more passionate about digging deep and finding a way to win. And sometimes that's what it is. That's what it takes. But also, part of that passion, at least in my mind, that passion produces preparation. And that preparation happened back before I even got to the Olympics because of the passion that I had. And I think that the people that are the most prepared oftentimes are the ones who will end up on top.
Adam: You have this passion for being popular. The passion for being popular evolves into a passion for becoming a great athlete, becoming a track and field star, becoming a great decathlete. How did you attain greatness and what can anyone do to attain greatness?
Bryan: This is a great segue into some of my companies and the things that I've done, but I think Bryan Tracy wrote a book called Eat That Frog.
Adam: Yeah, Bryan was actually a guest on the podcast.
Bryan: Yeah, great book, but really, it's why we named our company Eat the Frog Fitness. And it's because we all go through life and we have a choice that we can make. When I was training, I could choose to stay in bed and sleep every day until noon and wake up and go do something else. Or I could choose to wake up at 5:30 - 6 am and get to the weight room and train for seven hours a day, six days a week. Those were the choices that I had. And of course, there's all these micro choices that happened along the way. But if you want to be great, you just have to choose to do so. You have to choose to take one step at a time toward that goal. I talk to people a lot, and I always tell them these three things. I say, listen, as we're talking, I go, you've got to have a goal. That's the first thing you have to have.
But the second thing is you've got to have a plan. And oftentimes, I'll ask them, well, do you have a plan? If I asked you, what one thing are you going to do today that's going to help you get one step closer to your goal, could you tell me? And most people can't. And then the people that can tell me something. We'd unpack that a little bit. And we're not actually sure if that one thing that they were going to do is going to help put them closer to their goal. And so, we talked through that. And then it's like, OK, well, once you have that, then it's known you have to do what I say is the hard part. It's you've got to eliminate all the distractions. You got to learn how to focus and eliminating all the distractions I talked to people. I'm like what does that mean so I take them through an exercise and I say listen, here's what I want you to do I want you to go jot down on a piece of paper, all the different things that you have in your life all the different things that you deal with spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, socially, financially.
I want you to write them all down, and I want you to start to categorize them into those different buckets. Spiritual, mental, physical, emotional, financial, all those types of things. I want you to put them in those buckets, and then I want you to look at all those things. And I ask people to share what they've got, and some people have cars, and some people have houses, and they've got this, and they've got that, and girlfriends, and family, and all really important things. And I say, now the hard part is I want you to think about all of those things and think about which ones are putting you one step closer to your goal and which ones aren't. And I want you to start to cross out anything that's not putting you one step closer to your goal.
And typically, what happens is as people are crossing out, they start out with the really easy things. They're like, oh, the money. Okay, fine. The car, whatever. They start crossing all these things that don't really matter, but it always comes down to them getting to a few things that are not helping them get one step closer to their goal, but they really, really don't want to get rid of. It's just too hard to cut that out. And I'm always like, that right there, that right there is what's holding you back from becoming great. That's what's keeping you because if you want to be great, you can go across the board, and you can look at everyone that you would consider to be great at something, and you will see that they were willing to sacrifice just about everything to get there.
Now, I say that with a little bit of a caveat and that's that the third part is you have to have perspective, and you have to have priorities. And so, I talked to them about what my priorities were. And while people think things like family could be a distraction. What I've actually found in my life and what I was able to do was take my family instead of cutting them out because they were important to me. I found a way to make them a part of my journey, I found a way to make my family. one of the things that helped me get one step closer to my goal every day. Therefore, I didn't have to cut my family out.
And so, there's this process of creating this plan and having to figure out what the distractions are and all those types of things. But there's also this process of trying to figure out what's most important to you and making sure that those things are in the right order and that they're working together to help you reach your goal. so that you're not living two separate lives, one as an athlete and one as a dad and a husband and that sort of thing. But you're living one life where you're a dad, you're a husband, and you're an athlete, and you're trying to reach the Olympics.
And if you can do that, I really do believe you can do just about anything you put your mind to. It's not impossible. You just have to be willing to want it that badly. And the bottom line is, when I talk to a lot of friends and people, they say that they want something. We see this in fitness all the time. People say they want to get fit. They say they want to lose the 10 pounds or the 15 pounds or the 20 pounds, whatever it might be. But they don't really want to. They like the idea of it. They like the results that they know will come of it. But they don't actually want to put in the work to get there. And that's what holds people back. That's why people aren't great. They just don't want it bad enough. And they're not willing to sacrifice what's necessary to get it.
Adam: What was your routine when you were training for the Olympics? Initially, you won a silver, but four years later you came back and won a gold. You're sharing really valuable insights around what any one of us can do to get closer to our goals, and to become more successful at what we do. What did you do?
Bryan: Focus was a big part of it. I had to cut out all the distractions. I mean, I was the guy that was on the track that people thought was just an ass because I was so focused. I had fun and I did stuff, but when it was time to work, it was time to work. I wasn't there. to have fun. I was there because I had a goal that I was trying to reach and I needed to do what I needed to do. I was the first one there. I was the last one to leave. I gave everything I had. I was going to be the hardest worker out on the track every time. There was just no question. But I also had an amazing support team. because there are days when you get tired and there are days when you don't feel like doing it and you have to surround yourselves with good people. I was blessed enough in my life to have a coaching staff, to have a wife, to have kids, and to have my life set up in a way that supported me and reminded me of the bigger picture of what we were always going to.
And so, when I would wake up on those mornings and didn't feel like going to the track, I had a wife who got up before me and had coffee and breakfast ready for me to just try to make that decision just a little bit easier. When I was out training all day long, seven hours a day on average, and I'd come home. And I was tired and all I wanted to do was lay on the carpet, but my son or my daughter wanted to run over and jump on me and they wanted to just be with dad. I had a wife who understood what I had just been through during the day and would come over and not get mad at me because I needed just a few minutes to just gather myself, but would explain to my son like, hey, let's give dad 10 minutes. and she'd have coffee waiting for me. That's what helped me. It's not because I was like some amazing person.
I was disciplined. I had some talent and I worked hard and all those types of things, but I would have never, ever made it without the people that were supporting me along the way, without my coaches, without my mentors, without my family. And I'm not just talking about my wife and my kid, but my extended family, without my friends. I have some dear, dear friends that were there for me in some dark times that really helped me along the way. I think I did some stuff, but I didn't do it alone. And I think that that was probably my secret weapon.
Adam: You trained to become the greatest athlete in the world. You started a fitness company focused on helping people optimize their health and their wellness. How can anyone live a healthier and more fit life?
Bryan: You just got to move. That's what it is. I think everybody understands what it means to eat healthy. I think that's a little bit harder of a challenge to tackle. I think there are some very basic things that people can do. Listen, just try to eat clean. I think if you don't know what that is, you can go look it up but try to eat things in their natural form without all the extra stuff added as much as you can. Listen, I still eat the cheeseburgers. I still eat the ice cream. I still have the shakes and all that kind of stuff. But I do try to pay attention to what I'm eating and how much I'm eating and those types of things. But I still enjoy life. I don't let that take away from my enjoyment of life because that's what's important to me.
But in terms of fitness, you just got to move. And I think too often what we find ourselves doing is sitting on the couch or sitting in a car or sitting at a desk. And I think if you just started trying to move, you would find out that things would get better. If you just got up and walked down the street to get the mail that was your first step. Walking down the street and back and then down the street again and back becomes a little easier. And the next step just becomes a little easier. I often refer to life as a race. It's this race we call life.
But I always tell people what you need to recognize about a race is that it's literally just putting one foot in front of the other. That's all it is. Some people do it faster. Some people do it slower. It doesn't matter, but you got to put one foot in front of the other. So just move, find a way to move. If you want to get fit, just find a way to move, start moving somewhere, some way, somehow, and then that'll build and graduate into a bigger movement and a bigger movement and a bigger movement and a bigger movement, but you just got to start moving.
Adam: And that really speaks to everything that we've been talking about over the course of the entire conversation. How do you become great? How do you attain breakthrough success? It starts by taking that first step. Yep. That first step will lead to the next step and the next step and the next step, but you're never going to get there unless you get started unless you start moving.
Bryan: Absolutely. The first step is, it's always the hardest. It's always the hardest. And I try to tell people, once you take that step, don't be in a rush to take your second. Just take that first step a few times. It's like a baby walking. They're hanging on. And the first time that they let go and take that first step, they don't just take off into a hundred-meter sprint. You know what I mean? Oftentimes they take that first step, they stand there, they wobble, they fall down. Then they get up, they hold onto something again, and then they get the courage to let go and take that first step and they wobble and they fall down. And they do that a few times before the second step comes and before the third step comes.
And sometimes after the third step, they fall down. And believe it or not, even as professional athletes, being experts at running, we take a step and fall down. We have an injury, something happens, but you get back up and you do it again. And that's how you become great. You just can't quit. You just got to keep going. And I think if more people did that, they'd find themselves reaching all the things, all their dreams and aspirations, they'd find themselves reaching. And I don't think it's ever, it's never too late to start. Never, ever too late to start.
Adam: Bryan, thank you for all the great advice, and thank you for being a part of 30-Minute Mentors.
Bryan: Thanks for having me.
Adam Mendler is an entrepreneur, writer, speaker, educator, and nationally recognized authority on leadership. Adam is the creator and host of the business and leadership podcast Thirty Minute Mentors, where he goes one on one with America's most successful people - Fortune 500 CEOs, founders of household name companies, Hall of Fame and Olympic gold medal-winning athletes, political and military leaders - for intimate half-hour conversations each week. A top leadership speaker, Adam draws upon his insights building and leading businesses and interviewing hundreds of America's top leaders as a top keynote speaker to businesses, universities, and non-profit organizations. Adam has written extensively on leadership and related topics, having authored over 70 articles published in major media outlets including Forbes, Inc. and HuffPost, and has conducted more than 500 one on one interviews with America’s top leaders through his collective media projects. Adam teaches graduate-level courses on leadership at UCLA and is an advisor to numerous companies and leaders. A Los Angeles native, Adam is a lifelong Angels fan and an avid backgammon player.
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