I recently went one on one with Caryl Stern, Executive Director of the Walton Family Foundation.

Adam: Thanks again for taking the time to share your advice. First things first, though, I am sure readers would love to learn more about you. How did you get here? What experiences, failures, setbacks, or challenges have been most instrumental to your growth? 

Caryl: I am a Holocaust refugee’s kid, so I grew up in a home where my mom truly believed that she was blessed and fortunate to be an American, and to be alive in a time where she could use her voice. She would take us to a march somewhere from the time we were old enough to hold a sign, and we volunteered often. It was just part of our DNA growing up. So my entire life has been about purpose, mission, and voice. 

I started college at 16 and studied studio art—I’d always wanted to paint, but I realized that wasn’t the right career path for me. I had also been active in student government, so I worked at various universities, and then eventually the Anti-Defamation League asked me to help create one of the first anti-bias DEI curriculums for schools. That was back when no one knew what DEI meant, and we had to show that people learn bias, they’re not born with it. We ended up developing the program for companies too. 

From there, I went to UNICEF and learned as much as I could—I went to Mozambique, I sat in the refugee camps, and talked with healthcare workers and pregnant moms. I spent 14 years with UNICEF before meeting the Waltons and accepting the position at the Walton Family Foundation, where I’ve been for the last several years. I had instant admiration for them and the work they do. They’re focused on sharing what their grantees are accomplishing—and I was just awed by it. I was very lucky to get the job leading the foundation. 

Adam: What are the best lessons you’ve learned from leading nonprofit organizations? 

Caryl: You have to be passionate about the cause. You can have a lot of skills, but if you don’t have that, you won’t be as strong of a leader. 

You also need to take the time to get to know your team. You can’t motivate people unless you genuinely care about them. I have always put my family first, so I tell my employees to do the same. We’re best at work when we know that everything going on outside of work is okay. 

Adam: In your experience, what are the defining qualities of an effective leader? How can leaders and aspiring leaders take their leadership skills to the next level? 

Caryl: Be a lifelong learner, and understand that as a leader, you don’t have to have all the answers. We have to enable a group to find a solution, not always find it ourselves. 

We also have to learn to be wrong. I’m not always right, and if I’m going to empower my team, that means sometimes they’re going to be right more often than me. 

Finally, be consistent. I take time with my team at the Walton Family Foundation every year to talk about our values, and what’s really important to us as a team. We also have to call out when we’re not adhering to those values and make adjustments as needed. 

Adam: What are your best tips applicable to entrepreneurs, executives, and civic leaders? 

Caryl: I really believe in teams and collaboration. The best leaders aren’t heroes; they collaborate. At the foundation, we’re working really hard to define what collaboration means, because it used to mean working with people you have common ground with. That works sometimes, but it can also cause divides if you’re only talking to people you agree with. I think that a redefinition of collaboration, where you’re looking for common solutions instead of common ground, enables you to work with new people. Effective leaders listen to truly hear everyone, including those they don’t agree with, and work with curiosity, not animosity. Seek to understand their perspective and why they feel the way they do. It’s amazing how you can reduce tension and find solutions more quickly when you lead with that approach. 

Adam: What would you say is your best advice on building, leading, and managing teams? 

Caryl: Identify the skills you don’t have, and seek them in the people you hire. I bring what I’m good at to the table, so I want to find people who can do what I can’t. It’s important for a leader to create a team of people who have the skills you don’t and invest in them. 

Adam: What is the single best piece of advice you’ve ever received? 

Caryl: I was a stage manager for a play in college. The lead wasn’t able to make it to the opening night, so the director said I had to do it because I was the only one who’d been to all the rehearsals. And he said, if you forget your lines, just look at the other actors—they’ll jump in. You don’t always know what will come next, but trust that the people around you will help lift you up. 

Adam: What can anyone do to pay it forward? 

Caryl: Once, during my time at UNICEF, I stumbled upon a woman and her child in the desert. She didn’t speak English, but I could tell she was hungry, so I gave her the apple in my backpack. I had just thrown it in my bag at the hotel that morning, and it was probably the only thing she ate that day. We all have things in our backpacks that we take for granted, that are of use to someone else. Paying it forward could just mean taking an employee aside and asking how you can help. Or it might mean standing up for someone who needs it. Those pivotal moments propel leaders forward. It doesn’t always have to be a grand gesture—the little things make a difference. 

Adam: Is there anything else you’d like to share? 

Caryl: I’m the luckiest person in the world. I’ve had amazing opportunities cross my path, and even though I’ve worked really hard, I’ve still been lucky.


Adam Mendler is an entrepreneur, writer, speaker, educator, and nationally-recognized authority on leadership. Adam is the creator and host of the business and leadership podcast Thirty Minute Mentors, where he goes one on one with America's most successful people - Fortune 500 CEOs, founders of household name companies, Hall of Fame and Olympic gold medal-winning athletes, political and military leaders - for intimate half-hour conversations each week. A top leadership speaker, Adam draws upon his insights building and leading businesses and interviewing hundreds of America's top leaders as a top keynote speaker to businesses, universities, and non-profit organizations. Adam has written extensively on leadership and related topics, having authored over 70 articles published in major media outlets including Forbes, Inc. and HuffPost, and has conducted more than 500 one on one interviews with America’s top leaders through his collective media projects. Adam teaches graduate-level courses on leadership at UCLA and is an advisor to numerous companies and leaders. A Los Angeles native, Adam is a lifelong Angels fan and an avid backgammon player.

Follow Adam on Instagram and Twitter at @adammendler and on LinkedIn and listen and subscribe to Thirty Minute Mentors on your favorite podcasting app.