Don’t Be So Hard on Yourself: Interview with Executive and Entrepreneur Johnny Sirpilla
I recently went one on one with Johnny Sirpilla. Johnny is a longtime executive and entrepreneur who has served boards and worked with organizations including The Pro Football Hall of Fame, Camping World, Lippert Components, Society Brands, and United Way. Johnny is the author of Life is Hard but I’ll Be OK.
Adam: Thanks again for taking the time to share your advice. First things first, though, I am sure readers would love to learn more about you. How did you get here? What experiences, failures, setbacks, or challenges have been most instrumental to your growth?
Johnny: I truly appreciate the opportunity to share with you. Genuine leadership with the right intentions is a passion of mine. I’ve seen leaders shine brightly and others work hard to darken that brightness. Leadership is a complicated topic but in its truest form it all about being a Servant Leader. My journey to servant leadership is comprised of many paths.
The foundation is being raised well by loving and committed parents who had strict guard rails in my childhood stressing the importance of faith, honesty, integrity, and a hard work ethic. I was one of the lucky ones to be taught so intentionally to be set on a good path as I entered young adulthood. Yet I realized that while the foundation was provided for me, I had much more building to do to be a solid structure and force for good in the world.
Then personal grief, falling hard, and feeling lost created a mindset shift that can be so enlightening if you fight for the gratitude lessons that we all need. I fought hard to look for blessings in a tragedy that changed my life. It wasn’t enough for me to just get through the hard times, I need to “grow” through the hard times and come out as a better man, husband, and leader. This experience laid the foundation for my professional career in terms of the type of leader that I wanted to become. As I sold my family business to a new start-up that was doing the first national roll-up strategy in the RV industry, I was blessed to quickly grow to the top of the executive team and serve as the President and then Chief Business Development Officer as we grew to a $4b annual sales business with 12,000 employees. I was on a national stage to lead with integrity, honor, and a commitment to make those around me successful.
What I learned is that my leadership and those around me will always be tested. Sometimes with hopeful intentions and other times for malicious gain of those attempting to climb the corporate ladder. While disheartening, it’s understandable as people are looking out for themselves but this comes at a great cost to the company and most sadly to the employees working in chaos, confusion, and a lack of trust.
My new focus on gratitude drew me closer to wise people who I encountered throughout my heavy travel schedule, and I was privileged to witness leadership gems in others that I inherently knew that I needed to foster, understand and emulate. Today we hear so much about being your “authentic” self and I genuinely do not know who the authentic version of me is. I see myself as the sum of many parts of people wiser, kinder, and more loving than me who have inspired me to take some of their interaction with me as I leave them and bring it inward. I can feel and hear words that I use and feelings that I emote that appear to come from me but I know they were inspired with seeds planted by their wisdom that I have allowed to grow in me.
If I could ever uncover my authentic self, I may be moderately pleased or genuinely disappointed. I don’t know or much care. I fully grasp that we are not meant to walk solely in our own shoes but to soak in and learn from those who have had a much harder walk, more crippling experiences yet shine with a light that we can sit in. I’ve never felt that I have been in someone’s shadow, rather I’ve been in their light and I’m honored to share that with others through my unique combination of emotions, experiences, words, and connections.
Adam: What do you hope readers take away from your new book?
Johnny: My book was written for two purposes. 1) to honor my wife for all that she has endured for us to have a family (and tolerate me). 2) to support those who struggle when life is hard and for those who provide support for the journey. I wanted to help people see pain through a different lens. You see, my wife and I had it all. Our youth, our health, our faith, and dual careers that were skyrocketing (hers even faster than mine which gave me so much pride to be married to this strong, confident businesswoman) yet we couldn’t have children. By all measures of success, we were on top of the world from the outside but we were failing in what mattered most. As two people who defined our full measure of success as a stable home with a loving family, we were failing.
Years of trying yielded heartbreak and sadness and then our lives changed. We were pregnant for the first time. And very pregnant with triplets! The purpose of our struggles and hardships became clear, our destiny to be blessed with triplets. The joy we felt was unmatched by any previous life experience. We never had an ounce of fear about how we would manage triplets. We were three times blessed and it was incredible. My wife’s pregnancy was difficult … three times the hormones which led to more than three times the sickness. Susan got through the first and second-trimester vomiting, exhausted, and still working full-time as a pharmaceutical sale rep. Unfortunately, Nicholas, Mary, and Peter were born prematurely and died in our arms. Our lives stopped and darkness overwhelmed us. The days leading up to the funeral were confusing and there was little in our tank to function daily. The years that followed continued to find new lows, life-threatening medical situations for my wife, and through faith, determination, and clinging to each other we managed to adopt a baby and have two surprise pregnancies in 19 months and had 3 children under the age of 4 years old. The book outlines 13 different scenarios of children coming in and out of our lives before we raised our three kids.
As you see on the cover of the book, the subtitle is “the power of hope, emerging through pain and learning to live with gratitude.” That is the message that I’m sharing with audiences across the country today. Life is hard … it’s that simple. It is filled with moments of pure joy, gut-wrenching sadness, and situations in between.
We need to be the power of hope for each other.
We need to care enough about what is happening in the lives of others that our behavior shows how much we care.
We need to search for the blessings in the dark times to give us energy to get out of bed and battle through our hard times.
We need live with a “why not me?” attitude and never waste time in the “why me?” mindset. It will prepare you for your journey.
Our story merely serves as a back story to the psychological principles that we need to get through financial hardships, divorce, work pressures, tragedies, relationship struggles, and much more.
Adam: In your experience, what are the key steps to growing and scaling your business?
Johnny: Fun question! I’ve done this a number of times in various settings so the approach can be a little different with each endeavor depending upon the scale of the venture. It’s fairly obvious that the product or concept is where it begins but, in my experience, the human capital is where it fails.
The key is to find the balance in adding human capital, the right human capital, and balance that in with the financials that will afford you to bring on the team. In a scaling and growth business plan, you go through cycles of ramping up in growth and not having the team to support it. Then you hire more team members in anticipation of more growth and inevitably overhire or growth slows and your scale isn’t balanced. This is the toughest part to balance.
I’ll go back to my statement about the “right human capital”. It’s the hardest part of leadership because it requires making educated difficult choices regarding if each team member has the talent to scale with the business? Does their work ethic align with your culture? Their integrity? Do they add value to those around them or drain from them?
Companies have employees that grow at the same rate of growth as the company and in some cases, good leaders who outpace the company’s growth and pull the company along with them. Sadly, in far too many cases, companies outgrow their leaders, yet the leaders remain in place suppressing talent below them while protecting their own jobs and force good talent out of the company because of their self-serving leadership. This is what kills the growth plan because some opportunities are available in windows of time and then are gone. Our workforce today isn’t likely to hope things change and will quickly look for the greener grass in another field.
The summary … the primary key step is to scale your talent along with your business plan. The plan continually requires reassessment based on market conditions and the people do too!
Adam: What do you believe are the defining qualities of an effective leader?
Johnny: John Maxwell says it best … be a Servant Leader! That actually means to serve the people that you lead. It’s truly that simple. My job is to make the people around me successful. That’s it. What do I need to do as a leader to make my team successful in their job? That becomes my #1 job.
I perform that job by:
Ensuring there is a clear vision and mission for our work.
Asking them questions to see if the market conditions have changed that requires us to reassess our vision and mission.
Setting them up for success with their colleagues by having thoughtful interactions to ensure their relationships thrive independently of me. I need them to be connect, align, and support each other; not compete with each other for glory, praise or attention. Many leaders thrive on that competition with others crawling at their feet, so they can feel powerful. That sickens me and it happens daily everywhere.
Pay plans drive behavior! This is where most leaders fail by creating a competitive culture with colleagues having pay plans that are not congruent with each other and force them to battle at the cost of their employees below them and the company culture.
True leaders care about the entire individual; not just their professional side. We have the responsibility to create a culture at work that enriches them, lifts them up, and sends them home at their best so they can be a bright light at home. It comes full circle back to the company when a good home life sends an employee back to work feeling rested and recharged. We can’t control what happens in their homes, but we can control our culture at work and what we feed into their minds every day, and the mindset they take home with them.
Adam: How can leaders and aspiring leaders take their leadership skills to the next level?
Johnny: Be a sponge in the master class of life. For free, we can closely observe people that we feel drawn to and learn from them. We may be drawn to someone for the wrong reason because they appear to be living the high life and then if we really listen to them they may reveal traits that are really unattractive. It’s important to observe, capture the vibe and then decide if that is on brand for the leader you want to be. Many of those interactions will show you exactly who not to be. And then we are blessed to be drawn to people that create a classroom setting just while being in their presence. Key in on the words they use, the way their messages make you feel, and look for alignment in their words and actions.
For simple daily inspiration, I use my Instagram feed for teaspoons of wisdom. I’ve led the algorithms to bring me exactly the nutrition I need for my mind and spirt (and even my fashion tastes). I love watching the content that is fed to me because it lifts me up, makes me think, and often shop for books, clothing, or brands that are making an impact. You can’t let Instagram control what you’re fed. Take charge and fill your soul up with the nourishment you need in various phases of your life.
There are so many good books that guide us in the direction we want to go and need the most encouragement. Seek those out!
Additionally, I love taking leadership classes online to continue to sharpen my skills. I recently finished the certification course for Executive Presence and Leadership at the University of Pennsylvania Wharton School. It was fantastic.
Adam: What are your three best tips applicable to entrepreneurs, executives, and civic leaders?
Johnny:
Genuinely care about how an interaction ends with someone. Care for your well-being and more importantly, theirs.
There are no difficult or uncomfortable conversations if they are held with honesty, integrity, and a desire to make a situation better. It can even end in the termination of a relationship, but it can be done properly.
Don’t allow others to connect the dots on what they think you are implying in a discussion. Be clear in your messaging without assuming they know what you’re really trying to convey. State it, re-state and ask for a playback on important topics.
Adam: What is your best advice on building, leading, and managing teams?
Johnny: I love building teams! When looking for a leader of the team, ensure their values, ethics, and vision are aligned with yours. It’s a rookie mistake to assume without going deep into the weeds that a high-level conversation leads to the execution and daily management that aligns with your style. It’s confusing and unfair to employees to hear your vision and integrity and then watch you empower someone who does it fully share it. Building the team starts with the right leadership of that group. You can’t miss on this first step.
Leading the team requires a leader to turn around every now and then and ensure that they are being followed. A lot of time can be wasted spinning wheels without producing measurable outcomes which leads to frustration and teams crumbling because the leader was not inspecting what they are expecting. Another rookie mistake is assuming that the execution will be satisfactory from what could have been a poorly relayed plan without full understanding from the team.
Managing a team requires managing the emotions, expectations, and satisfaction of the team members. Pulse surveys are a useful tool to gather solicited, intentional input showing the team that you genuinely care about their experiences. Often the best improvements come from the front lines if they are only given the respect to hear what they think.
Adam: What are your best tips on the topics of sales, marketing, and branding?
Johnny: Personal branding is one of my favorite topics so I’m just going to focus on this portion of the question yet it will have ties back to sales and marketing. I focus on personal branding because it directly connects to how we market a brand or a company with an ease of application. When we focus on how we want to present ourselves for first impressions and hopefully, lasting relationships, it gives us an insight to how our product or company would speak if they had their own voice.
How do I want to be seen? How will I set myself apart from others? Am I an “also brand” … there is this one, also this one, and a line of other similar ones? Or am I bringing something unique to the workforce and market?
Your brand should carry consistently from one scenario to the next. Of course, there are natural nuance shifts that are appropriately needed depending on the scenarios, but that shift shouldn’t take you “off-brand”. Employees, colleagues, and consumers are equally confused when a brand (personal brand in this case) represents itself differently which can raise alarms. The biggest risk is the loss of trust in your brand. Once trust is broken, it is difficult to rebuild to the previous glory. There is the next best product or leader standing in line that would do anything for a shot in the spotlight.
Internal marketing of leaders is critical for their success in a company to drive sales and effectively lead. Internal marketing happens when we get in front of the leader and open doors to ensure the workforce realizes that the top leadership is behind the leader and supportive. The leader who is out on an island with employees wondering where they are going is at risk. The plan needs to be set out and marketed internally or externally through proper media outlets. This will set the table for success and then lead your way to greatness.
Adam: What is the single best piece of advice you have ever received?
Johnny: This is a simple one. While in college, I received a short-handwritten note from my dad in an envelope on a 3x5 piece of stationary with these words. I’ve been known for my sensitivity so I must have shared something with him that required this note.
Johnny,
Nice talking to you today. Thanks for the super card ... you’re good with the words.
Get tough. Control is the name of the game. Control finances, future, and feelings. The Three F’s .. how about that?
Son, as you grow older, you’ll find that we can’t always be responsible for what happens out there. We wait and swing with the punches. Sensitivity is an asset, too much a detriment. Balance is the name of the game.
Don’t be so hard on yourself.
Love you,
Pops
Adam Mendler is the CEO of The Veloz Group, where he co-founded and oversees ventures across a wide variety of industries. Adam is also the creator and host of the business and leadership podcast Thirty Minute Mentors, where he goes one on one with America's most successful people - Fortune 500 CEOs, founders of household name companies, Hall of Fame and Olympic gold medal winning athletes, political and military leaders - for intimate half-hour conversations each week. Adam has written extensively on leadership, management, entrepreneurship, marketing and sales, having authored over 70 articles published in major media outlets including Forbes, Inc. and HuffPost, and has conducted more than 500 one on one interviews with America’s top leaders through his collective media projects. A top leadership speaker, Adam draws upon his insights building and leading businesses and interviewing hundreds of America's top leaders as a top keynote speaker to businesses, universities and non-profit organizations.
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