I recently interviewed Mary Davis on my podcast, Thirty Minute Mentors. Here is a transcript of our interview:

Adam: Our guest today is a leader or one of the largest nonprofit organizations in the world. Mary Davis is the CEO of the Special Olympics, serving more than 6 million athletes across 172 countries with more than a million coaches and volunteers, and more than 100,000 competitions a year. Mary, thank you for joining us.

Mary: Well, thank you, Adam. I'm absolutely thrilled to be part of this podcast.

Adam: I'm thrilled that you're here with us. You're a native of Ireland, and you went to school to become a P.E. teacher. You worked as a P.E. teacher for a school that catered to students with intellectual disabilities. And at that time, you started volunteering for the Special Olympics. Can you take listeners back to your early days? What were the key experiences and lessons that shaped your worldview and shaped the trajectory of your success?

Mary: Well, yes, indeed, I'm a native of Ireland. Anybody can guess that by my accent, for sure. But I actually come from a very rural community in the west of Ireland from county mail. And it was a very tight-knit community when I was growing up. And it was a community that also depended very much on each other to get their work done. So there was that sense of if you need help, we're here to help you out. And we'll come and dig your potatoes on the farm. And you'll dig hours when the time comes. And everybody sort of joined in together, there was a wonderful phrase and Irish called the metal. And the metal was really, in today's world, the metal is probably volunteering, because that's what people did. They came together, they volunteered, in a sense, although nobody ever used that term volunteering, but that's what they did in that community. So it was a very strong community, very close-knit, there was a real sense of belonging there. And I think that that really inspired me about volunteerism about the community, and the importance of people as well. And the importance that every single person can bring to a community, as long as they're valued, and they're included in the activities and what's happening in the community. So I guess I saw that when I was growing up, and yeah, then I went on to college, studied physical education and education in general, and became a teacher in a special education setting. And as part of that I got involved as a volunteer. I have to say I would have been very influenced in my early years as well, by my mother, who was a very driven woman. She was a housewife. That's what you did in rural Ireland. Then your husband went to work. Her husband was like you would call the law enforcement officer, he was a policeman. So he actually lived away from home quite a bit. So in effect, she raised five children on a small farm. And it's so she had a great dependency on the community, for sure, and their generosity, but she was also an incredibly strong and resilient woman. So the combination of that plus my introduction then, through volunteering with Special Olympics, to Eunice Kennedy, Shriver, who is equally a very, very driven woman, who really never took no as an answer, believed that obstacles can be overcome. You could achieve whatever you want to in your life. And she had very strong faith, as my mother did as well, and a great love for people and for everybody. So I think between the community in which I grew up and between the influence of these two incredibly strong women that led me to do the things I suppose that I continued on that path to do in my life.

Adam: It's really important themes for listeners that we're going to dive into more deeply over the course of this conversation, the importance of volunteering, the importance of community, and the importance of having positive influences in your life. Starting off with your mom and continuing with Eunice Kennedy Shriver, who was such an influential mentor to you. Can you share with listeners how anyone can benefit from having a great mentor in their life? And in your experience, how can anyone optimize a mentor-mentee relationship?

Mary: Well, I do think it's very important to have somebody in your life that you can look to, somebody that inspires you to be better and to do more. And I very much saw that in both of these women. And these were women that were very restless, they had just a restless, rebellious sense of dissatisfaction, but of constantly wanting to make communities and make the world a better place. It's an infectious enthusiasm that comes from people like that. And I think we all need mentors. And we all need people that can guide us and people that we can look to and people that can influence and inspire us in our lives. That's what I felt these people did for me. And I think for any particularly young person, as I was coming out of college, then to have that experience from my own family from my own home and then meeting somebody as positive as Eunice Kennedy Shriver really helped me a lot to go on to do the things that I was able to do. So I would definitely suggest and encourage anybody to have a mentor, to have a role model that you can look to and try to emulate their practices and their passions.

Adam: Mentorship played such an important role in helping you rise within your career. What else helped you become the CEO of one of the largest, most significant, most important, most impactful nonprofit organizations in the world? How did you rise within your career? And how can anyone listening rise within their career?

Mary: Well, I think it was a combination of my passion and what I learned from being involved and being surrounded by people with an intellectual disability. So when I worked in St. Michael's House, which was the first special education setting that I worked in, I learned so much from people with intellectual disability. I learned about courage, I learned about strength, I learned about resilience, I learned about grit, all from just how they presented themselves and how they strove to overcome any obstacle that was put in front of them to be the best that they could be. And that's all anybody can ask for. We don't want to ask people to be the best, because there can only be a few people that can be the best in the world. But to be the best that you can be, is critically important. And I think that's something that we should all strive for, to be the best that we can be. And that's what I saw every day in the work I did as a teacher, and in the work I did as a volunteer. And that really drove me on to do more, to be able to provide more, but also to show others how they can learn from people with intellectual disability. These are people that so often have been excluded or marginalized, not seen for their abilities seen for their disabilities. And here, my teacher, learning so much from them, not what I'm giving them, but learning so much from them. Why can't others experience this? Why can't others experience and encounter people with intellectual disability because it is in that moment of encounter, that we really see the capabilities and the talents and the abilities of these people, and how much they can teach the world. And particularly in this particular time of companies and organizations and communities wanting to build more inclusivity within their companies and their communities. There are no better teachers than the teachers of Special Olympics athletes.

Adam: We're going to talk more about the Special Olympics. We're going to talk more about Special Olympic athletes. We're going to talk more about inclusion. But before we do I want to ask you about the phrase you just shared so beautifully. Be the best that you can be. Another way you can say that is to become your best self. How can anyone become their best self?

Mary: Well, I think we have to help people along the way. These things don't happen by accident. So what we do in the Special Olympics is create the environment where our athletes can be the best that they can be. So we would provide the services and the opportunities and the training. And no matter what, what we're going to do in our lives, that we need that training, we need that help, we need to sometimes feel that there is a shoulder to lean on. Or we can stand on the shoulders of others that can rise all of us up. And so that's what I feel we've got to do, we've got to create those settings and that environment where people can be the best that they can be. And then on the other hand, that we also create communities, that our understanding of the goodness that exists, and the talent that exists in every single person, and what everybody can bring to the table, if we all work together. So when I talk about leadership, I talk about teamwork. I talk about people coming together, sharing their experiences, sifting through challenges, and overcoming them, just like we see on the playing fields with our athletes.

Adam: What do you believe are the key characteristics of a great leader? And what can anyone do to become a better leader?

Mary: Well, leadership is so broad in some ways, you could spend hours defining it from empowering and motivating and communicating and listening and all the things that we know are given direction, giving feedback to people. I think all of those things are incredibly important when it comes to leadership. But I remember one thing that sticks out in my mind is when I was the CEO for the World Special Olympic Games, which were held in Ireland, on the island of Ireland in 2003. Actually, we thought we would never have a chance of winning the right to host the Games in Ireland, because we were such a small country. And we were going to have 165 countries coming in, we were going to have 10,000 athletes and coaches, 2000 members of the international press, we were going to look to involve over 200 communities and hosting athletes around the country. I mean, it was a mega mega event as all our world games are. But anyway, we won the bid, I became the CEO, which was just a wonderful, wonderful opportunity to do that. But when the games were all over, I got a gorgeous picture, a beautiful picture of Nelson Mandela and myself because Nelson Mandela had attended the games, these games in Ireland. But underneath that, it was a quote from I think it was James Quincy Adams. And it said, “If your actions inspire others to dream more, to learn more, to do more, to become more, then you're a leader”. And as they presented me with that, and this was just all of my staff and colleagues that I worked with, throughout the four years we spent organizing those games, they said for us, the staff, you embodied all of that. And for that, we want to present you with that. So it's that quote that has always stuck with me in terms of leadership. And I do believe that it's in your actions, it's in your attitude, it's in yourself. It's in how you behave towards other people, how you expect others to behave as well. It is that that inspires others. And if you can inspire others to be the best that they can be, as we were speaking about that, then that to me is real, real leadership. And it's walking the walk and talking talk. And that's critically important. I think. I love it.

Adam: How have you grown as a leader, by virtue of spending so much time directly with Special Olympics athletes? And what are the best lessons you've learned from your time with Special Olympians that anyone listening to this conversation can apply to their success as leaders?

Mary: Well, they're the greatest leaders that we have, in my view, because they've experienced so much in their lives. They've experienced so much exclusion, so much marginalization in so many challenges that they've had to overcome in their lives. They have that experience. And despite all of that they've met, allegedly to break down the barriers and to overcome the barriers and to strive to be the best that they could possibly be. So that is a lesson that I certainly take away from our athletes and that I would encourage and persuade others to, just to acquaint themselves to get to know people with intellectual disability. Because once you do, straightaway, something happens inside you, which is very difficult to pinpoint. Actually, it's very difficult to say what that transformation is that happens inside. Once you have an encounter with a person with an intellectual disability, as well as that they are the most joyful, fun, upbeat people that you could surround yourself with. And I think that that's really important in our lives as well, that not just do we strive to be the best, we work incredibly hard. Are we good listeners? Are we good motivators? Do we empower people, all of which people with intellectual disability do in my view, but you can also have some fun along the way, you can have a good laugh, you can enjoy? And it's that joy that comes through and wins out all the time, when you're in the midst and surrounded by people with intellectual disability.

Adam: Right at the heart of your organization, we spoke about this a little bit earlier is inclusion, everyone across corporate America is interested in inclusion, interested in building diverse and inclusive organizations. But when it comes to the Special Olympics, this is inclusion, how can leaders of all organizations build truly diverse and truly inclusive organizations?

Mary: Yeah, and I'm so glad you've said that because I think that's so important. Because when we talk about inclusion, we should talk about inclusion for everyone, whether it's in a company, in a community, in a school, in a preschool, whatever the setting is, we should talk about inclusion for everybody. But oftentimes, in our society, when we talk about inclusion, we don't necessarily talk about people with disabilities. And if we do talk about people with disabilities, we talk about people with physical disabilities, but not enough, I have to say as well. But rarely do we consider people with intellectual disability. And if we could only understand and particularly workplaces, workplaces could understand that they would be more productive, have a more satisfied and engaged staff, and would ultimately be more profitable. And that makes good business sense to include and to hire people with intellectual disability, then that to me, is a no around a company with the true inclusive ethos.

Adam: I want to ask you about a topic that is really central to the Special Olympics. What advice do you have on how to build winning teams, winning cultures, regardless of the kind of team regardless of the kind of setting? What can leaders do? What steps can we take? 

Mary: Well, I think when people play together, they learn together, and we practice on the playing field, our core of what we do we do through sport, but we use sport as a means to create a better environment to create a better society. So I think companies could certainly and organizations could use the opportunities through Special Olympics to expose their employees to a world that is about inclusion and inclusivity by playing together with people who may seem different to them. But often times aren't when it actually comes down to it, because it's only when you begin to play and interact and have fun with and be surrounded by people with intellectual disability and are athletes that you realize, hey, there is no difference. And we have this amazing unified champion schools program in schools across the U.S. And then many countries around the world as well, where young people with them without intellectual disability, literally just do that. In the school environment, they play together. And in playing together, they learn how to understand each other. And they learn that there is really no difference, and that sometimes when they may bully people that they believe might be more inferior to them. It's because they lack the understanding, they lack the knowledge, they lack the training. So it's really important that we particularly provide these real-life opportunities for young people, and for everybody, but certainly for young people to engage with the others that may seem, as I say, a little bit different to them, and to learn from them.

Adam: You mentioned the word understanding the importance of finding common ground, essential, not only for people in school, but for everyone everywhere. Integral to success, in just about everything we do in life, core to building successful relationships, and core to your success. Leading the Special Olympics is the ability to build and maintain successful relationships, relationships with your athletes, your volunteers with government leaders, you mentioned Nelson Mandela, with business leaders. In your experience, what are the keys to building winning relationships?

Mary: I think understanding others perspectives, I would say, is critically important. Because we're all different. And we all have different ideas, different views. But nonetheless, they're all very valuable. So if we bring those together in a community setting or in a group setting, then they can become hugely powerful. And we can learn so much from each other. And to go back to that example of organizing the 2003 games, which was such a mammoth task here in a small country. It was bringing together groups of diverse people, and brainstorming and working things out with them as a group. And going away then with a common set of goals to be accomplished. That was what brought us many times to the success that we had in those games. And they were incredibly successful games and transformational games for the island of Ireland as well in terms of people's understanding and more acceptance of people with intellectual disability. So well, I think there's a lot of other things as well, like everybody being honest with each other, building trust, building integrity amongst people, as well, are all very important actors, as well as understanding perspectives. But I think the more diverse our groupings, the better they are, and sifting through issues and in finding common ground and coming to a consensus and resolutions and moving forward. And having a vision I think is critically important as well. And that vision is not just a vision that the CEO has, or the chairman has, or the board has, it's a vision that's shared that everybody knows that people can buy into easily. Again, going back to that experience of 2003, we had a very simple vision. And it was a vision of pride. It was built around pride that all of the guests that would come to Ireland, all of the delegations and the teams, that they would be proud of their achievements in our country, but that we would equally be so proud to host them. So that sense of pride then unified everybody. And we ended up with fierce competition. Sometimes it's some groups trying to outdo others in terms of how they would create that sense of pride and do the best possible job that they could. So I think you've got to have the vision but you then have to implement and of course, then you've got to stick with it and stay with it. And that's where the commitment and staying power comes to achieve whatever that goal is that you set for yourself. And in our case, our vision is to create a more inclusive word for all for everybody. And how do we do that? And how do we stick with it and persevere until we get to where we want to be? And that does involve, of course, partnering with many, many companies, and also seeking policy changes, working with governments? It's working in schools, working in all sorts of different settings, to change the mindset and to change the behavior of people.

Adam: You shared so many great pieces of advice with listeners, I want to hone in on the importance of vision when it comes to leadership. Not every great leader is going to be a great visionary, not every great leader is going to have the vision of Steve Jobs, or of Bill Gates, or of Jeff Bezos. But all great leaders are going to understand vision, and when they see great vision, are going to recognize it, and are going to be able to communicate it effectively to the stakeholders within their organization. So the vision doesn't need to be your own vision. But it has to be a vision that everyone can rally around. And in the case of the vision for the games in Ireland, which you spoke about was a vision that was very clear, was very concise. And you're able to attain buy-in from everyone in your organization. And that's what was able to lead to this great success.

Mary: Yeah, absolutely. And vision to me is hugely important. And we have a great mission and a vision ourselves in the Special Olympics. And our vision is to create societies which are totally inclusive. And we often use that phrase to choose to include, and that's our call to action, we just ask companies, organizations, groups to choose to include, and you will be better as a result of that. So setting the vision is critically important. And to me, that's the job of a leader. If you ask me what leadership is, leadership should be about setting the vision then inspiring, building, motivating teams, defining the appropriate management style, and attitudes to see that vision through, and having a lot of empathy as well. I think those are all really critically important in terms of the core vision. I think that's the leadership side. And I think there's a great distinction between leadership and management. And many times people get both confused or mixed together. Management is very much a different approach in the sense of it's more about project management, documented plans, getting things done on time and within budget and assigning resources, and having contingencies and all that sort of stuff as well. Which, by the way, I think is equally important in the success of organizations and businesses. But sometimes there's an overemphasis on that side and less emphasis on the leadership side. But the leadership side, the empathy, the vision, the bigger picture, that you're buying into something that's much bigger than you are anybody else. That's important and setting that, to me, is critical.

Adam: Mary, you mentioned the word empathy twice. And you could mention it 50 times, you can't mention it enough. Empathy is essential to being a great leader. I did an interview with the former CEO of Skype, we spent almost the entire podcast talking about the power of empathy. Great leaders love people, great leaders understand people, great leaders truly feel the pain of the people around them and put others first. Leadership is not about your needs. It's about the needs, the wants, the desires, the goals of everyone else around you.

Mary: Absolutely couldn't agree more with you. And what is empathy? Well, it is about reaching out to people, it is about being there for people. We're all not in top form every day of the week. We just can't be, we’re human beings. Sometimes we need support. Sometimes we need a shoulder to lean on, somebody to cry with, to share our downs, share our highs, that's empathy that's reaching out. That's listening to people and making them feel that you are there for them. And you're going to help them to achieve this goal, whatever that is. But it's also about giving direction to people and ensuring that they have the knowledge that they need to do their work in the best possible way. And oftentimes, we do overlook that we put people into positions without the necessary training that's required, so that they can fulfill their role and responsibility in the best possible way. And to me, that's really important, and that is empathy. And knowing when to push and knowing when to pull and knowing when to support. I always say, I'm tough, but I'm gentle, I'm tough, and I have set the goals. And we have the vision of the organization, very clear anyway. And we all work hard, we support each other, and we do the best possible job. And of course, we make mistakes. And again, everybody makes mistakes in their lives. And it's only by making mistakes, and we learned to be better. But as long as you're not repeating these mistakes over and over again. So I think tough, but gentle is one of the ways that I would certainly describe myself for sure.

Adam: Do you have any tips for leaders listening to this podcast? On how to be effectively tough, but gentle? Because it's something that I think many people would like to be, but don't exactly know how to be successfully. What would you share?

Mary: Yeah, I think it's knowing when to push and knowing when to pull back. To be honest, as I said, once your vision is clear and your goals are set, people are adequately trained and prepared to be able to undertake their role and responsibility with great courage. And I say that whether it's an employee or whether it's a volunteer, actually, because the same goes for no matter what capacity you're doing your work, whether it's a paid person, or volunteer person, you've got to ensure that you've got those things in place for people and that they do feel that adequately confident to carry out their role and responsibility. But once they do that, then I'm a super believer in delegation and in delegating then to people so you know what to do, it's very clear, it's very defined, just please go and do it. And I trust you, I trust is very important, I trust you to do that job. And the trust must be both ways as well, you must trust the person you're working with, they must be able to trust you as well. And then you expect them, there's an expectation, with that responsibility that you expect them to deliver in a certain way. That doesn't mean to say that if they have a problem, and they need help, that they can't come and sit and discuss and thrash out and build a tiger team, or whatever it requires to overcome some challenge or some obstacle that somebody is facing. And that's where empathy comes. You just don't leave that person and say, right, I've explained, you gotta go and do it. That's it. But you listen again, and you give direction and you give feedback. I think that's all part of empathy.

Adam: Mary, how can anyone listening to this conversation do to become more successful personally and professionally?

Mary: I would say choose to include, absolutely choose to include. Be very open in your mind, blow your mind open to others, to their weaknesses, to their strength, to their greatness, to the opportunities that they might present to you, grasp them all, embody them, live your best life with them, learn from others, because that's how we develop ourselves. We take all the experiences, all the opportunities that come our way, and we do the best that we can in our lives. And for me, it's about choosing to include everybody, and that includes particularly for us, in our organization, and in every organization and company, I believe, choose to include people with intellectual disability.

Adam: Mary, thank you for all the great advice and thank you for being a part of Thirty Minute Mentors. 

Mary: Thank you very much.

Adam Mendler is the CEO of The Veloz Group, where he co-founded and oversees ventures across a wide variety of industries. Adam is also the creator and host of the business and leadership podcast Thirty Minute Mentors, where he goes one on one with America's most successful people - Fortune 500 CEOs, founders of household name companies, Hall of Fame and Olympic gold medal winning athletes, political and military leaders - for intimate half-hour conversations each week. Adam has written extensively on leadership, management, entrepreneurship, marketing and sales, having authored over 70 articles published in major media outlets including Forbes, Inc. and HuffPost, and has conducted more than 500 one on one interviews with America’s top leaders through his collective media projects. A top leadership speaker, Adam draws upon his insights building and leading businesses and interviewing hundreds of America's top leaders as a top keynote speaker to businesses, universities and non-profit organizations.

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