Passion and Perseverance
I recently went one on one with Olympic gold medalist Mary Wineberg. Mary is also a public speaker and the author of Unwavering Perseverance: An Olympic Gold Medalist Finds Peace and the upcoming children's book I Didn't Win.
Adam: Thanks again for taking the time to share your story and your advice. First things first, though, I am sure readers would love to learn more about you. What is something about you that would surprise people?
Mary: I am sure readers would love to know that I have always wanted to meet Whitney Houston. I have always had a star crush on her and was very saddened that she left this world way too early. She was an amazing singer that would make anyone think they could sing, dance and believe in their dreams, but she was full of life. I at one point in time believed that I could perform and be Whitney Houston's stunt double. But you know I never got the call… so I just lived through that dream! So yes, I always wanted to be her stunt double.
Adam: Looking back, what is your sharpest or most significant memory from your Olympic experience?
Mary: I actually have two memories. First, I will have to say that my sharpest memory from the Olympics would have to be standing on the podium, getting the Olympic Medal placed around my neck and just realizing that I had just accomplished something that many don't get to do. It hit me that I would always be known as an Olympic Gold Medalist - never former, never past - I had just made history! My second memory from the Olympics was being able to walk into the Bird's Nest Stadium with the USA Basketball Team. You know the Olympics are aired on NBC and I was able to not only meet and talk with Kobe Bryant, but I got the chance to discuss just how amazing it was going to be to race in the stadium while walking next to Carmelo Anthony. Having this opportunity not only allowed me to see that this Olympic experience was going to be phenomenal but I would be able to cherish this forever. I had worked my ass to get to this moment and I was ready to race and embrace this opportunity.
Adam: What is something that would surprise people about the life of an Olympian?
Mary: A lot of people often will assume that Olympians are always the best of the best or they resemble superheroes in that they are so tough and strong and can subdue anything put in their way or that simply put that their life is perfect. Well, I wish that I could say that I had a perfect life, two supportive parents, an amazing relationship with my birth mother, a feeling that I belonged, and knowing that I was talented. That just simply wasn't the case in my life. I had a lot of adversity occur! Before becoming an Olympian, I was a young girl who struggled with thinking that she couldn't be great, I felt angered with feeling abandoned, I felt as if I wasn't talented, I felt that I didn't belong. I was blessed to be adopted by an amazing woman who raised me as her own and taught me that greatness lies within us all. She provided tough love, support and allowed me to try athletics. She wasn't a huge fan at first but learned to be flexible and allowed me to find my voice. I had to learn to be confident, to break out of my feelings and realize that I was special. I had to realize that I could be the best of the best. After graduating college I had to be ok with stepping outside of my comfort zone. I was destined for greatness and I have an extremely blessed life. So yes, people are surprised when I share and I am transparent about my story! I am just a girl from Brooklyn who overcame and pressed forward towards a dream that seemed impossible. Olympians get nervous, we get scared, we are human too. Oftentimes when I am speaking at conferences or events, people are shocked to hear my whole story. They are also inspired at the same time that I became an Olympic Gold Medalist, despite it all.
Adam: How did you get here? What failures, setbacks or challenges have been most instrumental to your
growth?
Mary: Wow, I got here by the grace of God. I believe that we are born and our paths are determined. Yes, life happens and we can't necessarily control those things that may ultimately have a huge effect on us and change the paths. I got here because I had a support system, a single mom who loved me, family, coaches, friends, my sorority sisters, my church, my godparents, my mentors, teachers, anyone who played an instrumental part in my life. I cherish each and every person who didn't give up on me - they believed in me even when I didn't believe in myself. I was able to learn valuable lessons and ways to showcase my best self. Growth for me represents a life-changing opportunity that makes you realize your worth, your outlook on life and that no matter what challenges come my way I will overcome them. I have learned that I can be my biggest setback - I had to learn to state things differently - I can, I will, I am and yes, this is my first goal and the next goal after that. Now I am so happy that I can walk into a room and command the attention of everyone that I meet with the words that come out of my mouth, my genuine actions and my story of my humble beginnings. Growth is a beautiful thing.
Adam: What are the best lessons you learned from the achievement of becoming an Olympian and then a
gold medalist?
Mary: I learned that I could set a goal, I could train my body to the limit, I could also have downfalls but I didn't have to let them define me - it is about how I pick myself up from it. I learned that having exciting moments and wins allowed me to see where I could go. And I learned that I could be a winner, an Olympian and a Gold Medalist. I learned that I have unwavering perseverance.
Adam: In your experience, what are the defining qualities of an effective leader? How can leaders and aspiring leaders take their leadership skills to the next level?
Mary: You know for me being an effective leader is someone who is passionate, confident, shows courage, shows vulnerability and a leader is one who builds with others to make something into the best that it can be. For me competing in the Olympics in the open 400 meters and not making the final, I could have counted myself out. What I learned is that I still had an opportunity to help out my team. I could still be seen as a leader even if it was within my 4x4 relay. I wanted to make an impact, be a model and I wanted to execute the race. I set aside my fears, I set aside comparing myself to my teammates who may have had resumes greater than mine own! I took pride in knowing that the coaching staff and my teammates considered me as an addition to making winning a gold a reality. So together we were effective! You know leaders can be different and showcase their skills in different ways, so my advice for leaders and aspiring leaders is for them to continue to push forward with a plan that is communicated with all, be able to act quickly, and stay positive. Make sure to nurture and teach others that you are leading up as well. We all had someone at some point help to shape and mold us so let's play it forward as well.
Adam: What are your three best tips applicable to entrepreneurs, executives and civic leaders?
Mary: 1. Have a plan. 2. Don't be afraid to ask for help. 3. Surround yourself with others who share the vision but also don't be afraid to take ideas in and look at a different perspective.
Adam: What is the single best piece of advice you have ever received?
Mary: I was taught a poem in college titled Don't Quit. I learned just how important the words were and the true meaning. To this day I use and reference this poem because it applies to life as well. Here is a piece: “When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, when the road you're trudging seems all uphill, when the funds are low and the debts are high, and you want to smile, but you have to sigh - when care is pressing you down a bit, rest if you must, but don't you quit!”
Adam: What is one thing everyone should be doing to pay it forward?
Mary: Everyone should be serving as a role model for others to see that yes you can support causes that are out there, yes you can do a good deed out of kindness- I love to play it forward and I don't do it to show off I do it because it is genuine and from the heart. It can be simple and very impactful.
Adam: What are your hobbies and how have they shaped you?
Mary: I have lots of hobbies, I enjoy running, reading, writing, teaching, traveling and commentating. I am passionate about working with kids and teaching them to be their best- I have written two books and I feel like my interest allow me to put all these things together to find happiness and peace
Adam: Is there anything else you would like to share?
Mary: Thank you so much for this opportunity. It has been a pleasure listening to some of your podcasts and to do this has pushed me even more to continue to step outside of my box. I am excited about the opportunities that I will continue to be blessed with...thank you for all that you do and best wishes! Let me know if you need a co-host… and hey, I'm always trying to surround myself with those who are doing great things! Thank you Adam!