Be Afraid of Not Trying: Interview with Ralph Pisani, President of Exabeam

I recently went one on one with Ralph Pisani, President of Exabeam.

Adam: Thanks again for taking the time to share your advice. First things first, though, I am sure readers would love to learn more about you. How did you get here? What experiences, failures, setbacks, or challenges have been most instrumental to your growth? 

Ralph: I started my career trying to make an independent film. I invested nearly every penny I had to try to get this film launched and failed miserably — and this was only the first failure of my career. 

I needed to get a job to pay rent and found one selling payroll services. I wanted to make a transition, and one of the people I called on was the president of a cybersecurity company called Sophos out of the U.K. This guy clearly saw something in me because he offered me an opportunity to move into cybersecurity. I knew nothing about cybersecurity or even much about technology in general, but I was at least comfortable with technology – I just hadn’t seen it as a career path. I ended up running a division that was a division of one — me — and it launched my current career. In the newly-created business development role, I started to build relationships with other companies, and that led to more career opportunities down the road. 

Eventually, I was introduced to Exabeam founding investor and board member Shlomo Kramer, who was running Imperva at the time. He brought me on, and I ended up taking on increasing responsibilities and eventually worked my way up to SVP of Worldwide Sales where I was in charge of running the global enterprise. After taking Imperva public, I moved onto another cybersecurity firm before becoming one of the founding investors and EVP of field operations at Exabeam. To this day, I’m thankful to Shlomo and all of the opportunities he has given me. 

Adam: In your experience, what are the key steps to growing and scaling your business?

Ralph: Number one, as I was alluding to before, don't be afraid of failure. I'd say I've made even more mistakes than good decisions and I pride myself on learning from them. The other thing that is really important to growth is to build the right culture. At Exabeam, we've built a culture of communication. One of the things that I like to do as a leader that I think is really important is getting as many people as possible involved in decisions and direction. I read that when George Washington was going to make a decision, he would talk with his lieutenants to get their opinions and then distill them and his own thoughts into the direction he would ultimately take. I try to operate in a similar kind of a fashion so I don't just work with one stream of information. A modern leader also needs to get people bought into the mission early in the process, to understand the “why.” 

The other thing about scaling an organization is you really have to make sure you're building a product or a service that fits what your customers want. A lot of organizations, especially in software companies, start out with this idea of building a product based on customer needs. But then after they’ve had some success, hubris starts to set in and pretty soon you start to think you know better than the customer knows. You have to listen to your market to be able to scale at any kind of speed.

Adam: What is your best advice on building, leading, and managing teams?

Ralph: In the software business, you might have a great Chief Product Officer or a Chief Revenue Officer, but they don't necessarily build great leaders below them. That's where I see a lot of organizations fail. As a leader, you really do have to build your replacements and the people that are going to step in for you. You want to be building future leaders at all levels of the organization. I remember the Exabeam Chief Revenue Officer, Chris Cesio, had a Navy SEAL organization come in to talk about what it takes to build a Navy SEAL team. They talked a lot about the E-5s (which are the middle level) and how important they were to keeping stability in the organization. I think that very much ties into how you would want to build an organization. You might have this strong leader that's charismatic, but that only gets you so far. You need that middle-level of management that keeps the heartbeat of the organization going. 

And sometimes people just need a pat on the back or reassurance that it's going okay, and that affirmation that we're heading down the right path. We've lost a little bit of that through COVID — that and the realization of how important it is not just to pay somebody but to give them affirmation that they’re doing great work and are on the right track. I think that's a really overlooked aspect of leadership. Ultimately, the leaders are responsible for keeping the organization focused and positive. The leader has got to set the mood and the tone and keep people engaged in the organization.

Adam: What are the most important trends in technology that leaders should be aware of and understand? What should they understand about them?  

Ralph: First and foremost, change is happening so fast and will only continue. For example, three years ago, we built an on-premises product. We wanted to be a software-as-a-service (SaaS), but all of our customers were telling us it needed to be on-prem, that a company’s ‘crown jewels’ would never go to the cloud. Two years later, it's all in the cloud. The point is that in building a modern organization, you need to be ready for what’s next. We sell an IT security product. And if we were an all on-prem product today, we'd be out of business because the market quickly shifted to SaaS, and we were ready for that shift, but many were not. 

This happens in a lot of different areas. If you're building a technology company, you can easily end up building a saddle for a horse, and everybody's driving a car. You've got to get your organization in a position to take advantage of change and to do so at speed. In our case, the way customers manage security and the way they think about it is evolving and changing very rapidly. You could really get behind if you don't keep up with those changes, and that requires you to really listen to what's happening in the market.

Adam: What do you believe are the defining qualities of being an effective leader?

Ralph: First, you’ve got to lead by example and be willing to jump in wherever needed. So for example, if a sales representative calls me and says, “I need to get you on the phone with a customer,” I'm going to jump and do it. I work for the rep at that point and am there to support them. If as a leader you have a high motor and team members see you working at 11 p.m. to hit a deadline, that's infectious. Basically, if you’re going to ask somebody to run through a wall, you’ve got to run through walls, too. 

I think emotional intelligence is still a relatively new concept for business, but it's so important to really understand your people and what makes them tick. Not everybody's motivated by the same things, so I need to know what makes my direct reports different, and how what Person A needs from Ralph may be different than what Person B needs from Ralph. 

But third and most important, you have to earn the respect of the organization by doing the right thing, like having a strong moral compass. I'm going to make fair decisions. If I think a salesperson is not getting a fair shake from finance, I'm going to have their back. Or if somebody's trying to make a short-sighted decision on compensation, I'm going to have their backs but I'm also going to hold them accountable when it’s needed. And you can’t avoid difficult conversations. If I think someone's underperforming, they deserve straight feedback so they can make the necessary changes. 

Adam: How can leaders and aspiring leaders take their leadership skills to the next level? 

Ralph: I think being self-aware is really important. You have to understand who you are and reflect that in your personal leadership style. If, for example, you happen to be a more introverted leader, that's okay — you don't need to be loud and gregarious. You can be quiet and methodical, and maybe a better listener than the more outgoing leader. So, you listen to your team and then counsel and guide them based on what you’ve heard. Or it could be you’re a more motivational person, in which case you kick your team in the butt and inspire them to go make the next goal. Understand your leadership style, refine it, and ultimately operate based on who you are.

Adam: What are your three best tips applicable to entrepreneurs, executives, and civic leaders?

Ralph: Whoever you are, and whoever you’re talking to, you need to understand and connect with the audience. You need clear, concise, and frequent communication. Let people know where they stand, let people know what the goals of the organization are. I think Mike DeCesare, our CEO, does a very good job of this. He boils down the mission into very understandable chunks and then keeps the organization marching together to complete the tasks to achieve it. 

We’re all dreamers and you dream of having things happen. But execution is where the rubber meets the road. To get that execution, you need to keep the organization focused on the task because you're going to constantly get sidetracked on new projects and new ideas. 

It’s also important to remember that if you expect the organization to be of high moral integrity, you better have the same high moral integrity. You need to take the time to understand where people are in their own lives and where they want to grow, and then help put them on that path. I've had good people in my life that have motivated me to take the next step in my career and coach me on how to get there. 

Adam: What are your best tips on the topics of sales, marketing, and branding?

Ralph: Understand your market and listen to your audience. It's that old saying about God giving us two ears and one mouth for a reason. Listen more than you talk. In sales, we get so excited about the product, and we’ve trained salespeople to be excited, so they get in a sales situation and just bury the customer with data. Instead, ask questions. Extract what matters to them. Where are they heading? What are they afraid of? What don't they like about their current situation? Get to know them and understand their environment. Then you can tailor your message and your presentation to what fits their needs. I think this gets missed a lot in sales organizations.

Adam: What is the single best advice you've ever received throughout your career?

Ralph: Don’t be afraid to fail. Be afraid of not trying. That is what drives me every day. We all have insecurities. I think one of the things I've been able to do is harness my insecurities to make me work harder or be more positive. Whether it's trying to launch a new product, or even trying to advance your career, sometimes fear is the biggest impediment to advancing. Maybe you’re afraid to ask your boss, what do I need to do to grow or afraid of a direct conversation or confrontation. Get rid of all of that and don’t be afraid to fail.

Adam: Is there anything else you'd like to share? 

Ralph: I think you’ve heard some common themes throughout. Lead with integrity, build a good culture, communicate effectively, and don’t be afraid to fail; be afraid not to try. Those are the lessons I’ve learned. 


Adam Mendler is an entrepreneur, writer, speaker, educator, and nationally-recognized authority on leadership. Adam is the creator and host of the business and leadership podcast Thirty Minute Mentors, where he goes one on one with America's most successful people - Fortune 500 CEOs, founders of household name companies, Hall of Fame and Olympic gold medal-winning athletes, political and military leaders - for intimate half-hour conversations each week. A top leadership speaker, Adam draws upon his insights building and leading businesses and interviewing hundreds of America's top leaders as a top keynote speaker to businesses, universities, and non-profit organizations. Adam has written extensively on leadership and related topics, having authored over 70 articles published in major media outlets including Forbes, Inc. and HuffPost, and has conducted more than 500 one on one interviews with America’s top leaders through his collective media projects. Adam teaches graduate-level courses on leadership at UCLA and is an advisor to numerous companies and leaders. A Los Angeles native, Adam is a lifelong Angels fan and an avid backgammon player.

Follow Adam on Instagram and Twitter at @adammendler and on LinkedIn and listen and subscribe to Thirty Minute Mentors on your favorite podcasting app.